A Well-Rounded Approach to Better Sleep

Stress and anxiety are some emotional experiences strongly correlated with sleeplessness. Grief, loneliness, and excitement also have a strong impact on our quality of sleep. According to Cognitive Behavioral Theory, our feelings are activated by the thoughts and beliefs we focus on. So the feelings listed above are brought on by the active and latent thoughts you bring with you to bed.
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People who experience insomnia for a period of time sometimes develop anxiety around sleep itself, on top of their other life stresses. They may be painfully aware of every passing minute they’re not sleeping, thinking ceaselessly about how tired they will be the next day. They may start to lose confidence in their ability to sleep, and blame their failure to sleep for the other problems they’re facing. They can develop bedroom phobias and start avoiding the bedroom and sleep altogether, to stop feeling like a failure.

So how does one clear their mind and calm their heart before crawling under the covers?

Calm the body first

1. Give yourself a foot or hand massage before bed. Consciously relax the tension in the muscles of your shoulders, neck, and back.
2. Yawning helps your nervous system relax. If you fake a yawn, a real one will usually follow.
3. Follow a brief "bedtime yoga" video to stretch and relax your body.
4. Use essential oils like lavender, chamomile, bergamot, jasmine, rose, and sandalwood to enhance a feeling of peace. Dab a couple drops on your wrists, neck, or pillow. Or you can add them to a warm, relaxing bath before bed.
5. Eliminate blue light from screens at least 30 minutes before bedtime. Read a paper book with a soft glow reading light or close your eyes and enjoy the darkness. Use an eye mask if your room isn’t dark enough.
6. Slow, mindful, deep breathing from the diaphragm lowers cortisol levels, reducing stress. Slow your breathing down, take deep belly breaths and exhale for a little longer than you inhale. 
7. Sleep for the season, with appropriate, breathable pajamas, bed sheets, and blankets.
8. Weighted blankets induce a feeling of safety and calm in your body. They can be worn over your body while you sleep, but they can be hot, so people in warmer climates might use them to relax and then remove them to sleep. 
9. Adjust the temperature in your bedroom between 60° and 67° F. This range of temperature is thought to help facilitate the stability of REM sleep.
10. Moderate to vigorous exercise helps initiate and maintain restful sleep. Be sure to exercise in the morning or afternoon to cooperate with your circadian rhythms and keep your sleep time on track.
     

Curate your mental activity

1. As you’re getting ready for bed, consciously turn your attention away from the day’s activity and toward how good it will feel to sleep. Get into bed mindfully, consciously feeling the sheets and blankets, experiencing the pillow under your head, and imagining melting into the mattress like a stick of butter in the sun.
2. Drown out anxious thoughts with peaceful sounds. Green, brown, and pink noise are effective at inducing sleep. Try each one to find out which is most soothing for you. Nature sounds such as ocean waves and rainstorms can also be calming. Use the timer function to ensure the sound ends after a short time so that it doesn’t interrupt your sleep.
3. Follow a guided sleep meditation to focus your mind on peaceful thoughts.
4. Write a bedtime mantra to repeat to yourself as you relax into sleep. One example is “Everything is ok, I am safe”.

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Ease your emotions

1. Place a hand on your heart, take a slow breath, and smile. Feel a sense of peace wash over you from head to toe.
2. Cross your hands in front of your chest and hook your thumbs together, palms facing you. Slowly tap your chest, alternating sides, right left right left. Close your eyes and smile.
3. Hum soft, gentle notes as a lullaby to yourself. The vibration of humming soothes the nervous system. Chanting the word "Ohm" or "Voo" has the same effect.
4. Snuggle with a live or stuffed-toy animal or a pillow. Tell yourself you are safe and happy.
5. If you have someone to hug before bedtime, be sure to take advantage of the calming power of co-regulation.